There is an oft-heard expression that says, “Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for a while and leave footprints on our hearts and we are changed forever.”
This is the time of year when I reflect on the presence of a lovely lady in my life who I only knew for a year, but 23 years later, her influence in my life keeps showing up. I briefly mentioned Reverend Nancy in a previous blog. She was the female Presbyterian minister who took a chance by hiring me as the Christian Educator in Family Ministry at her church.
She made me so nervous when I interviewed for the position. I sat before a panel of half a dozen people that she presided over. I definitely felt that she was observing me while I spoke, and then she would ask pointed questions, take in my responses, and look to the others gathered at the table. I had no idea what she was thinking--she was probably great at poker—because she gave nothing away! I was astonished when I got the call that the job was mine, and thus began a journey that still reverberates in me to this day.
Reverend Nancy had so many gifts: she was an insightful, thought provoking preacher, she could sing and play the piano, she made people laugh and never held back her own, which was awfully contagious!
She listened and offered hope to people who otherwise thought themselves unworthy.
She was also honest about her own mistakes and shortcomings, which made her so relatable.
Reverend Nancy never admonished us to do something that she wouldn’t do herself. When she gave a sermon about Saint Paul being a “fool for Christ” in 1 Corinthians 4:10, she proved her point by dressing up in full clown regalia from head to toe: wig and make up included! I still keep a picture of her in that get up in a frame on my desk at work. I aspire to be so courageous and take chances like that.
Reverend Nancy was a true mentor for me, and I know without a doubt that I would not be doing the work I do today if I hadn’t crossed paths with her.
Eight months into my tenure, Reverend Nancy announced that she had been diagnosed with lung cancer. She was 51 years old and hadn’t smoked since age 25.
The chemo took a toll on her almost immediately. But she transformed her suffering into something beautiful and precious for the rest of us.
One Sunday morning, overcome by sheer exhaustion from the chemo, she pulled up a stool up to the altar and preached from there. She talked about “the thorn in the flesh” that Paul mentions in 2 Corinthians 12:7-10, and how he petitioned the Lord to take it away from him.
She could relate to that. Her agony was real.
The Lord’s response to Paul was, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.” I remember thinking I would not have been thrilled with this response. When I am in pain, I want it to go away, instead of being told to suck it up because God will give me whatever it is I need to make it through.
Reverend Nancy put a special emphasis on the final lines of this passage:—“I will rather boast most gladly of my weaknesses, IN ORDER THAT THE POWER OF CHRIST MAY DWELL WITH ME…for when I am weak, then I am strong.” That stopped me in my tracks. While that statement seemed like a paradox, I was witnessing a living example, hunched over a bit on that stool behind the altar. Reverend Nancy was clearly at her weakest and most vulnerable, which helped her make room for Christ’s power in a way previously unknown to her. With no distractions or agendas to pursue, other than simply making it from one moment to the next, a power was unleashed in her like never before.
Power didn’t mean healing. Power didn’t mean trumping this battle with cancer. The power of Christ at work in her meant she could place herself in God’s hands, trusting that all would be well, even if she didn’t survive the cancer.
Reverend Nancy passed away four months after she was diagnosed. She was physically in my life from February 9, 1997 to February 22, 1998: one year and thirteen days. In the grand scheme of my life, she was not part of it for long.
Indeed, as the opening quote says, she came into my life for a while, left footprints on my heart, and has changed me forever.
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